I feel that I am getting to more of a definitive point now but just questioning how bold some areas are. i do enjoy the harshness of marks but i think so whiteness could blend certain areas more effectively. It’s hard trying to find a balance between kind of outraging my inner thoughts into a piece and then them being too literal and harsh but with giving myself time, I’ve certainly been able to see this in a new perspective. The motion painterly marks, remind me of the mobius strip from Annabelle’s session and maybe I was subconsciously referencing that. It all get’s so exciting after going to workshops and learning so much more, I’ve opened up windows, I may never have anticipated.
It’s actually been so much more exciting creating collage this year!
Wow time does really effect how you look and develop your work, I’ve learnt so much more just from stepping back and coming to and from making the work. Spacial awareness is considered so much more and I’m actually understanding why I’m making it so much more, which obviously helps. The visuals and little bits of documents are all like my continuous thoughts and processes to letting out my inner self i guess. I don’t want to use the word mood-board but I guess you could perceive it that way, I find my self jotting down notes here and there and making small drawings to help stimulate ideas but seeing all these small fragments come together to this scale has helped so much more. It’s like a respondent to my videos, sound and visual pieces, I’m visually expressing this part of my brain which wonders more so in my sleep. marks which correspond to the disturbing sounds etc.
Within my last tutorial, a good point made which seemed to stick with me was the fact in previous video developments, I’ve tended to layer and work into them too much. I seem to get this idea in my head that everything needs working into a lot to feel complete. I maybe even throw too many different ideas and thought processes into one piece and in doing so, the strong visuals and moments become lost. So in this latest piece, I’ve kept these factors in mind and cut down on the amount of overlaying, speeds and general multi-medium usages. I’ve still layered where I felt necessary but to a point where I felt made sense and worked appropriately with the composing visual.
Using a group of boomerangs (an app which repeats for a number of a seconds, which is basically a mini video loop) and some previous documented sounds, I have built this collage of imagery sequences. The main elements I want to reflect were the moment of transcendency, a moment where one is coming out or into a deep form of sleep paralysis. This feeling of just getting to the point of feeling yourself moving again, the paralysis is surrendering itself to a point and you’re just getting to the point of ‘normality’ again (even if this takes a few minutes or hours to process and feel okay again). The recordings are all instant reactions to triggers from my sleep. Whether its conversations, odd sounds or visuals, they all give me this sudden recognition to a memory or a weird feeling related to my sleep. Not always an obvious trigger but possibly a subconscious moment, which later reacts over the following nights sleep but the fact remains of still recording these moments which trigger a part of my brain. Buzzing sounds are a popular outcome to awakening more so and it feels like somethings trying to escape my ears. Sometimes lights flicker and i get sudden shocks, ‘I see the light’ – If i can’t joke about these things these days, what can I do to be honest. The boomerangs of myself, felt like an instant exposure and reaction to the more sexualised moments within my sleep paralysis and refer back to previous work I’ve made around the confusion I get with them (enjoyment? Sexual abuse?).
In further research I think i need to keep these recordings going and see how an even larger buildup of visuals impact the above spoken about. Consider ways of presenting again – what makes most sense?…
We’re now getting to the point of really needing to consider ways of publicising our work and raising funds for our degree show and a paper sale seemed perfectly fitting! I’m proud to have sold 2/3 pieces and it was a great way to show how truly diverse we are as year group. Raising nearly 500 pounds was more than we ever anticipated and we hope to make more events like this which should be just as or even more of a success!
It was overwhelming to finally having some work sold! I’ve definitely started to learn to really consider what type of work fits best to certain exhibits, having one failure submission helped this process and I’m planning to continue submitting in M.A.D.E’s next show!
For the past few weeks I’ve really started trying to think about the best ways to reach out to another part of myself. I’m still in the process of fully understanding this need to document ongoing thoughts and collage fragments of processes but one thing I’m currently certain of is that using text and building collage of a longer period of time (in comparison to last year) has made me read the work in so much more context. It feels to have resinated with me far more, it leaves time to question, make more appropriate decisions and possibly open up far more than i ever would have anticipated.
Inspired from Annabelle Craven’s workshop on the topic of ‘Neology’.
I have created a sound piece which plays around with the term of Neology, Neology is when one brings words together which may be of great significance to them or their work and in doing so, creating a new combined term.
My words chosen were ‘Distorted consent’ – translated to the new word ‘Convent’. So in this sound piece I worked with the distorted truths of peoples thoughts and feelings they may struggle with. I wanted to research into how people react to personal questions such as ‘disturbed thoughts and sleeping issues’, it was interesting to see how much people were willing to expose in regards to these subjects. The word consent comes into play with the fact of me recording these people whilst asking them questions but to then only afterwards say what I had actually done. I’m interested in the boundaries of consent and how far one can go without actually breaking boundaries. There’s such a blurred line when it comes to what is and isn’t right and I guess this ongoing project is helping me to discover the answers to this question, that’s if there even is an answer? I’ve also used recordings of everyday sounds, I felt these sounds worked effectively as they’re sounds which I get within my sleep paralysis. I felt adding these sounds touched back upon the idea of opening up to my own issues and how the everyday becomes just as effective in ones sleep, only adding to the disturbed things one encounters. I guess this is the other ongoing project I have which intertwines with the consent project, they’re distorted everyday sounds, this idea of the everyday becoming just as significant and confusing, my issues being exposed in-between other people exposing theirs.
I decided to repeat one sound recording and the recording of Jodie throughout the sound piece as I felt most effected by these pieces. I felt they were getting the message across most efficiently. The sound piece was from a tv programme over Summer and had this sense of time running out and tension and Jodie’s recording had this sense of vulnerability and realism, it felt intense but real and honest. And in repeating these elements, I feel you as the viewer recognise more of this idea of intensity and vulnerability, I don’t want it to be more obvious as such but to feel more striking and exposed.